How to Hobby
Any good unicorn worth their salt knows that it's essential to have a hobby (or two...or three...no matter what their PI says)!
When I started grad school, I was too caught up in socializing with my cohort and attending fun events to really think about what I wanted to do in my spare time. It's a story for another post - but after a couple of years, I learned that hobbies will be there for you when other people aren't, and especially when your work isn't enough to keep your spirits afloat.
The hard part might be finding a hobby. Or keeping it alive. Or feeling like it's not a complete waste of your time when you could be in lab instead - especially when it's totally unrelated to your PhD. So, let's walk through each of these together and I'll explain how I'm making it work.
1. Finding a hobby
I'm lucky that came into grad school already knowing what I liked doing - I grew up playing violin from a very young age and music has always been a part of my life, although I wasn't playing regularly after college. I also picked up weightlifting during my undergrad days.
What if you don't know what you like to do? Then congratulations, trying new things is now your hobby!
Okay, that can sound really intimidating. Maybe you hate being bad at things (trust me, me too). But I say take advantage of being a newbie - your excuse for being bad is that you're new! As for how to find those activities to try? Look for opportunities. The grad student organization at my school hosts discounted classes like pottery or candle making sometimes, or you could ask if you can tag along to your friend's SoulCycle class as their plus one. If you prefer a solo activity, I've seen fellow students enjoy drawing, knitting, crocheting, or even taking singing lessons. I was lucky enough to attend grad school in NYC, and there's no shortage of crafting or workout classes or music groups you can try out in the city if you poke around online. And if all else fails? Well, apparently in NYC, one hobby you can do is to pick one food category and try every place that sells that. (I was doing ice cream for awhile.) The key here is to look for opportunities that seem interesting, and to then wholeheartedly pursue them.
I'll use my violin life as an example. I played in lots of ensembles and took lessons from elementary school through college, but I was left kind of afloat after graduation. Turns out, when you don't have auditions or orchestra classes pushed onto your plate by coaches and conductors, it's harder to find them (go figure). I'm not gonna lie, I'm not self motivated enough to practice solo repertoire without a performance in mind - I don't even like solo playing all that much!
Still, I brought my violin in its dusty case with me when I moved to NYC. And I quickly found out that there is a student orchestra that exists at Columbia's medical campus. When it started up again post-pandemic, I tried my hardest to be friendly with the other students, and luckily I met my friend Eric, who has his hands in basically every community orchestra in Manhattan. From there, I was introduced to the world of community orchestras, which gave me the outlet I was looking for - a structured commitment with higher level playing and conducting/coaching for public performances.
2. Keeping your hobby alive
Now that you have your hobby, how do you have time for it? People ask me this all of the time.
Having a hobby is kind of like taking care of a plant. (Being a plant person is also a fun hobby by the way.) It's not always easy - you have to take the initiative to nurture it, and occasionally you might have to put in the extra effort to repot or find a new sunny spot. But hopefully, your regular care for it can become part of your normal routine.
How do I have time for violin? Well, it's not that I have time for it - it's that I make time for it.
Committing to a community orchestra gives me a set rehearsal and concert schedule. Even if it's pouring out and I had an awful day in lab, if it's a Wednesday, chances are I'll still hurry off to the subway to make it to rehearsal on time. Sometimes I say no to dinner with friends because I have to play some Beethoven or Rimsky-Korsakov instead. So long as orchestra is a net positive on my being, though, I will always think that it's worth prioritizing.
Another example: my friend really loves taking workout classes since she's not a solo gym-goer. If she's paid and signed up for her barre or cycling class, she's gotta go to make sure that money isn't wasted. Another one of my friends enjoys knitting, and she loves knitting gifts for people. That gives her a "due date" for her project, which means she will set aside time to make those gifts. Sometimes hobbies might be a bit of a pain, but if you really like doing them, it can be easier to push past the parts that feel like a chore.
3. Is a hobby a waste of time?
My short answer is no. My long answer is no, absolutely not. I don't think every waking minute of your PhD existence has to be devoted to research (see my post about mental 9-5s).
The value of a physical pastime is pretty clear (health is wealth). The benefits of creative hobbies might be harder to parse.
Let me set aside a little bit of my humility here and say that violin is one of the few things I actually feel like I'm pretty good at. After a long day of negative data, rehearsals can actually keep me sane - I feel accomplished if we have a productive session where we sound better and I've led my section well. So at least I have a little success at the end of a bad work day, and that sends me off to the rest of the week with a slightly better mood.
My friend who likes knitting feels fulfilled when her loved ones receive her gifts. Another who likes pottery loves trying new glazes and seeing how they turn out each time she goes back to the studio. It's that little bit of motivation outside of work that can give you something to look forward to even when other parts of life feel bleak. That's not even mentioning the community and friends you can make through your hobbies!
I'll also say that if your concern is benefiting your professional life, the community you build outside work can be very helpful. Not only is it good to get a sense of perspective (the world is bigger outside the drama in your PhD program!), you might also meet some interesting connections. Eric has landed some conducting gigs despite being in his PhD for bioengineering. I've been connected to people who work in finance or biopharma consulting. People really come from all walks of life, and sometimes your hobby can put you in the same room as someone you've been wanting to meet.
Having and nurturing a pastime doesn't come easy, especially when you're a PhD student already strapped for time rerunning experiments. But I think you'll be better for trying to make it work.